Ginny Pippin

RL 480

July 9, 2005

A Question of Marriage

KEY FACTS

• Catholic couple, married 20 years
• No previous marriages
• Have two teen-age children
• People have witnessed their periodic rocky relationship
• They have repeated seemed to reconcile
• Recently, Cheryl had Fred arrested for domestic violence
• Fred since filed for divorce
• Cheryl is convince she can’t live with Fred’s violence and mood swings
• Cheryl considers the divorce inevitable
• She wonders if she could get an annulment and ever re-marry in the Church

OTHER FACTS TO KNOW

• Were repeated reconciliation genuine

• Why did they get married, e.g., loved each other, pregnancy, etc.
• Circumstances surrounding the consent, e.g., outside pressures, maturity
• Has their marriage been troubled from day one
• Was their relationship prior to marriage happy
• Did they or anyone have reason to anticipate a divorce or nullity
• Were they married by the Church
• What reasons could there be for violence and mood swings, psychological, substance abuse, etc.
• Is there presently or was there prior to marriage substance abuse

PASTORAL ISSUES

• If psychological or medical intervention would mediate the situation, would Cheryl want to continue being married to Fred
• Does she or he want the divorce, e.g., is he filing out of revenge for being arrested and is she giving in because she is by nature passive

• The children in this family will be affected by the divorce in many ways; however, pastorally they may have issues around their own legitimacy. They may wonder whether they are illegitimate, because their parents’ marriage was invalid. They may wonder if they may choose to change their name to their mother’s last name. Will their friends and family treat them differently?
• The community around this family will be saddened. Individual family members and friends may become depressed, confused, overwhelmed and feel alienated.
• An effort should be made to help Cheryl and Fred achieve wholeness and healing
• Each has the right to a life that is full, happy, and life-giving. Extending the freedom to do so is important
• Encouraging full union with the worshiping community is essential

CANONS

The case does not specify otherwise, therefore, I am assuming no prior impediments, no defects of canonical form, and the proper celebration of the marriage ceremony.

• 744 Public recognition of consent

• 1055 Sufficient reason and understanding – emotional, psychological, physical competence, presence of mind altering substance – respect for spouse
• 1057 Consent
• 1060 Valid until proven otherwise – can’t remarry – public reputation as husband and wife
• 1095 Motivation, ability to live up to demands of marriage, presence of personality disorder, pre-marital pregnancy, immaturity, etc. Capacity to make prudent judgments, can be manifested by such things as an appreciation of spouse as separate person, caring for the spouse’s welfare
• 1107 Defective consent
• 1159 Convalidate if party knew marriage was not valid
• 1671 Who can ask for annulment

LITERARY, RHETORIC, HISTORIC

Since the Middle Ages, marriage has been modeled after Roman law and the Code of 1917 reflected this. The present Code defines marriage, which was not previously done and establishes marriage in accordance with Vatican II as a covenant not a contract (c. 1055). This important distinction, however, is lost in the reality that three canons use the word “covenant” and more than 43 use contractual language. It would seem that the Romans Law continues to influence our Church today.

Canonist make a distinction between marriage as the act of being constituted, matrimonium in fieri, and marriage in the act of being lived-out, matrimonium in facto.

The importance of this distinction is that a marriage in fieri can lead to a marriage in facto. The reverse is not possible and therefore without the first, the marriage cannot be valid.

MY POSITION – Pastoral Minister

RESOLUTION

As a Pastoral Minister, I cannot resolve this issue or assure her of an annulment. That is the role of the Tribunal. Further, I must remember that I am only hearing one side of the story, and it is not my place to take side or make judgments. I can, however, assist her by guiding her through the categories that might show just cause. The understanding of the Church is that the marriage is valid until proven otherwise (c. 1060). Assuming there were no impediments, a church marriage and knowing that the marriage was consummated and others witnessed their union, I would be apt to direct her to consider issues surrounding their consent to marriage. Was the divorce initiated by the husband as a knee-jerk reaction to being arrested, or was it a desire to no longer be married. Were the husband’s emotional outbursts medically treatable? Were they indicative of a psychological inability to be married making the marriage null. What were their reasons for marrying? Was it love, pregnancy, parental pressures, immaturity, etc. I would suggest she assess why her marriage has lasted 20 years. Why did they continue to reconcile, i.e., love, commitment, maturity, or fear of what would happen if she left him, etc. If either did not consent at the time of their marriage, is it possible that consent was entered into during the past twenty years? Was their consent lucid, mature and free of obstacles? Could or should the marriage be salvaged? Would this put her safety in jeopardy? If the marriage is determined valid, a couple does not have to live together. Mental and physical well-being must be protected.

GROUNDS FOR GUIDING HER

Cheryl was worried and as a Pastoral Minister I am obligated to provide pastoral care (c. 517). In so doing, hopefully I would be able to help her not be consumed with worry. The important issue becomes that presented by the second Vatican Council. Were they “living-out” their marriage, and if they were, then more than likely their marriage was valid.

ETHICAL, PASTORAL, THEOLOGICAL

Ethically I can act in a pastoral capacity but not as an advisor, counselor, or social worker. Theologically, scripture states that a marriage cannot be dissolved. What is being considered, however, is a statement of nullity. In other words, the issue is whether there is a legitimate marriage. If so, it cannot be dissolved. If, in fact, the marriage is not recognized as valid, then the two parties are considered as never having been married and are free to marry.