This I Believe

I believe in listening to people. Last week, I was bored and watched an episode of “Life” on NBC. It's not a bad show, and it keeps my interest. The two main characters are cops, and they were investigating a murder of a man blown in half. They found out that he had two wives, and he was almost never home to entertain them. The two officers asked them why they would stay with a husband who was almost a stranger. Both of their answers were the same. “He listened to me,” each of them said. I was shocked. An average looking guy got two very attractive women to fall in love with him just because he listened to them. I thought, “This listening thing really works.” Even though the show is fictional, I do believe that it does convey how important listening can be.

To know the importance of listening, you have to know what listening implies. Instead of just hearing your speaker's message, you are responding to it. When you listen to someone, you are trying to understand them. To me, listening means that you are trying to grow from someone else. My father and I always argue. Not the stereotypical argument between teenager and his father, but the argument as a part of a discussion. He and I always begin civil, but then we end yelling at each other until, eventually, someone storms out of the room. But sometimes, whenever I feel stressed, I talk to my Dad. I tell him how I am feeling, and he listens to me. Just knowing the fact that someone else is listening to me makes me feel better. Then, somehow, he tells me exactly what I need to hear. Whenever I talk to my Dad, I always end up feeling better.

I am a member of the Knights of Columbus, and a few weeks ago, I went with them to help rake leaves for the nuns at a convent. There, I met the most wonderful elderly woman, Anne Marata. She was a school teacher at Gesu for twenty years and a wonderful story teller. For hours, she told stories about what life has taught her and the lessons in faith she had learned. She told me about when her husband walked out law school. Worried about her finances, she was furious with him. After prayer and reflection, she realized that the problem was not in her husband but in herself. She said, “I was trying to decide what was best for him when I learned that God has plans for him that I could never understand. I've been happy ever since.” I realized how worldly and experienced this woman was, so I listened to her intently, and it made me all the wiser.

Without listening to others, it is impossible to work with them. That is why good leaders are often the best listeners. How effectiveness of politicians can be measured by how good of a listener they are. They spend millions each year on public opinion polls and focus groups because they want to understand how their constituents are feeling. In Hillary Clinton's 2000 Senatorial campaign she introduced a “Listening Tour.” Such a smart political tactic made her look much more favorably among the voters and ultimately led to her election to the Senate.

I think everyone can see the benefits of listening. I go to John Carroll University , and for me to do well in any of my classes, I have to listen. I do not think any student every got an “A” in a class where he or she did not listen. Also, a few weeks ago, I woke up and wanted to drink a Pepsi for breakfast. My Dad told me it would give me a stomach ache, but I did not care so I drank it anyway. A few minutes later, I thought my stomach was going to explode. Instead of doing whatever I wanted, I should have listened to my Dad.

David Hearty

David Hearty